Wrath of The Titans

Welcome to another episode of Lights....Camera....Popcorn!

Today's review is Wrath of The Titans.

Directed by Johnathan Liebsman

Written by Dan Mazeau & David Johnson

Screen Story by Greg Berlanti, Dan Mazeau & David Johnson

Review #155

MPAA Rating: PG-13 for intense sequences of fantasy violence and action.

Runtime: 99 min

Cast

Sam Worthington ... Perseus

Liam Neeson ... Zeus

Ralph Fiennes ... Hades

Édgar Ramírez ... Ares

Toby Kebbell ... Agenor

Rosamund Pike ... Andromeda

Bill Nighy ... Hephaestus

Danny Huston ... Poseidon

John Bell ... Helius

Over the years you all have read my incessant rants about the motion picture industry. Directed mostly at the utterly clueless people that run it. I can't seem to grasp why filmmakers insist on providing an audience with substandard products just because some money can be made. It sounds like I just cleared up my confusion. The almighty dollar reigns supreme in any business. Why should the movie business be any different? I'll tell you why.

Because the movie business has the ability to RECTIFY THEIR MISTAKES!!!! Most businesses can't or don't have that luxury.

When a film makes a lot of money but is ravaged by critics and the general public alike. An opportunity is given to them in the form of a sequel. Now conventional wisdom would dictate that if your crappy film made a ton of money. Wouldn't a better sequel do the same if not improve the till? That's the conventional wisdom approach. We all know when dealing with Tinseltown.

Conventional wisdom goes out the window the moment a sequel is greenlit.

Plot


Perseus braves the treacherous underworld to rescue his father, Zeus, captured by his son, Ares, and brother Hades who unleash the ancient Titans upon the world. 

Oh man did this movie SUCK! I don't know where to begin. I'll start with the premise. Once again like in Clash of the Titans, the gods of Olympus require prayers from their followers in order to remain all powerful. This is by far the most absurd aspect of both films. I remember gods in other films being vengeful towards the people that failed or refused to worship them. Their power wasn't taken away. It was put on display to remind everyone that without them their lives would be meaningless. To emasculate a deity because someone stops praying to them is just ridiculous and lazy writing. This senseless plot device forces the humans to get back into action and that doesn't help the film either. This is caused by the very underdeveloped script.

If I had to describe Wrath of The Titans in one word it would probably be....lifeless.

The film just moves from scene to scene. Giving you no time to digest what just happened. The characters are all automatons just meandering along until the next beast needs to be slayed. The script gives none of these characters any depth or structure. Why is that you ask? Because you were expected to remember these people from the first film. Again just lazy. The greatest crime committed by this film is the very predictable and just idiotic switcheroo at the end. Zeus and Hades were and always have been bitter enemies. Clash of The Titans did a piss poor job representing that. It's even worse here. Then they fight along side each other in the hopes of stopping the titan Kronos.

WHAT????

This leads to another example of paycheck writing. All throughout this train wreck of a film, the gods constantly pontificate that they can't defeat Kronos at full strength. With their diminished capacities due to the "UGH" lack of prayer, they don't stand a chance. So what happens? Zeus and Hades both on the verge of death muster just enough juice to give dear old dad a slap or two. Just enough for Perseus to deal the final blow. Are you kidding me? You can't tell us that the gods are powerless against the titan in one breath. Then in the next breath show the gods getting their shots in against the titan.

For a while I was wondering if Michael Bay was involved with this project. Since he is the unbridled master of destroying popular franchises and making you hate what you used to love as a kid.

There were a couple of positives but I won't bother getting into them. Firstly, this film doesn't deserve any positive acclaim. No matter what form it comes in. Secondly, it won't help the score or my recommendation. I can't express into words my gigantic disappointment with this film. These guys screwed the pooch with Clash and didn't learn their lesson with Wrath. I'm sure most of you will see this film and I'm sure it will make enough money to make the powers that be happy. That's what makes me sad. When a group of people can't get a story right from source material that's already awesome enough as is. You're in for a world of hurt.

At least I was watching this. I'm going to watch the 1981 Clash of The Titans now and try to forget that this experience never happened.

On the 5 star scale. Wrath of The Titans gets the goose egg. 0 stars. With a "For The Love of God Stay Home!" recommendation.

That's a wrap for today.

Until Next Episode...."I'll Save You A Seat!"

"D"