Clash of The Titans

Welcome to another episode of The "D" List.

Today's review is Clash of The Titans. Directed by Louis Leterrier. Written by Travis Beacham, Phil Hay and Matt Manfredi. Based on the screenplay of the 1981 Clash of The Titans written by Beverly Cross.

OK. Here it is. After months and months of waiting, Clash of The Titans has finally graced our local cinemas to take us back to a time of greek gods, mortal heroes and mythical creatures. The day it was announced that a remake of one of my favorite films of all time was going to be remade I was very worried. The original 1981 film has a special place in my heart. I can recite most of the film verbatim. Don't believe me just ask Kaite and Ilana, they spent the better part of past few weeks hearing me quote Sir Laurence Olivier's Zeus' dialogue as I passed by the hallways at Productions.

"My lord Poseidon, I command you to raise the wind and the seas.....DESTROY ARGOS!!!!!!! And to make certain that no stone stand that no creature crawls, I command you to let loose the last of the titans. Let loose the KRAKEN! The kingdom of Acrisius MUST BE DESTROYED!!!!!!!!"

OK you guys get it. The point is that when I have dedicated my entire existence to maintaining a love affair with a 2 hour spectacle of fantasy and fun how in the world can that be duplicated short of creating a shot by shot remake. Then the trailers came out and I bought in to what they were selling. They were able to show me enough of what made the 1st film so great while establishing some of their new tricks of the trade. My anticipation grew by leaps and bounds as the release date approached and in this case as is the case with most films I can't wait to see I set myself up for a major let down. This time was no different.....Well sort of.

After mankind declares war on the gods of olympus, Hades the god of the underworld and Zeus' brother persuades him to allow Hades to unleash a wave of terror and destruction on man. This will then force man to once again pray to the gods thus regaining their strength and immortality. It's here where we see Perseus played by a very cardboard Sam Worthington arrive at the shores of Argos with his adopted family just as Hades unleashes his 1st attack on the people. During the attack his family is killed creating an uncontrollable lust for revenge against Hades and the gods for the death of his family. This establishes the quest that Perseus goes on to stop the Kraken from destroying Argos while bringing him closer to defeating Hades.

I left the theater feeling very befuddled. I didn't know if I liked it or loathed it. Not a good place for the film to make a person feel. After thinking on it for a couple of days I figured out that I liked and loathed it. Here's why.

It begins with the core story. It's too complicated. I just gave you the main focus of Perseus purpose in the film but there are subplots between Zeus vs Hades, Zeus vs Perseus, Zeus vs the rest of the gods of olympus and finally The gods of olympus vs man. There are too many battles fought between several entities that the film doesn't have time to develop them and you don't have time to invest in them before the next one takes over the narrative. Now I will play fair. The original had a similar issue with subplots but there's 1 major difference. The main rivalry was in the beginning and throughout between Zeus and Theddus the goddess of the sea. The story then spilled over to their children. Perseus with Zeus and Calibos with Theddus.

The next issue is the flow of the script itself. As I was watching it there wasn't something quite right about the pacing. Things felt rushed and then it hit me. Now remember this is my opinion but I feel that the writers wrote this version under the assumption that we have seen the original and that we will remember some of the core elements thus removing the need to re-hash the old stuff over again. BAD MOVE! We all know what assumptions do to people and in the film world they can backfire with disastrous consequences.

This remake needed a severe dose of plot and character development. These people just get thrown at you in the blink of an eye and you are expected to care about them without any rhyme or reason. Strike 2 with the lack of character development is the introduction of new characters, there are several here and they are explained with a small line of dialogue or a quick exposition scene. Not good enough. With a movie this big and full of rich and exciting characters, they deserve no DEMAND to be recognized. Instead they are treated as re-treads while the story moves along.

Finally, the last issue with the script is basic common sense.

Example #1 - Why in the world would the gods need to fear man? They are immortal, omnipresent beings responsible for their whole existence. Yet they fear weakness when man stops praying to them? RIDICULOUS!!!

Example #2 - Just like the original, Perseus is a demigod (Half man Half god). He's also the son of Zeus. The problem here is that Zeus had NO IDEA that Perseus was his son until he was told by Ares. C'MON MAN!!!!!!! You can't expect me to believe that the father of the gods and the creator of man doesn't have a clue that he fathered a child on earth.

Example #3 - The gods feared the Kraken. This is just absurd. Zeus ordered Hades to create the beast so why in god's name (no pun intended) would he fashion a creature that had the power to destroy them? Once again these are the weakest gods I have ever seen. Not the way I remember them. What made me fall in love with Sir Laurence Olivier's portrayal of Zeus was despite the many comments and criticisms about his over the top acting was the fact that when he was angry YOU KNEW IT!!!!! He literally commanded respect and accepted nothing less than total and complete obedience and compliance from his brothers and sisters. Just in case you didn't know the rest of the gods of Olympus, Apollo, Athena, Ares, Hermes, Poseidon, Hades, Aphrodite are all Zeus' siblings. Including his wife Hera. This isn't to say that Liam Neeson's portrayal as the God of Thunder wasn't strong because it was. In fact it was a lot of fun to see him bellow his commands and slam his fist down on his throne in disgust. It's just that the script while able to maintain his power, stripped him of his command. You'll know what I mean when you see it.

Alright, I know I sound like I'm killing this film and I probably am but there was a lot to like about this movie.

#1 The special effects along with the character designs were impressive from the harpies to Pegasus to Medusa to the Kraken. All top notch and smooth. They each had their own little twists that separated them from the original versions. Pegasus is a black stallion rather than a white one. (Wasn't a fan of that change but he still looked cool) The Kraken was massive yet not clumsy looking and finally everyone's favorite Gorgon was slick, agile and surprisingly very beautiful until she laid her gaze on her victims. This was a very nice tweak to what I remember Medusa looking like in the original. In fact they got it right from the mythology. Medusa was always beautiful even in her Gorgon form, she only became hideous when she turned men into stone.

The byproduct of the CGI characters were the action scenes they were in which were all impressive. The highlight being an air battle between Perseus/Pegasus and the harpies at the end. The scene I was anxious for was the battle for Medusa's head and while it was a treat for the eyes it was too quick in speed and length for my taste and too ADD driven. The thing that drew me to the original scene in Medusa's lair was the fear that she instilled in the warriors and in the audience. The scene was intentionally show to ratchet up the anticipation. The music had a dreadful feel to it which amplified the danger. Here it was more like a sportscenter highlight. Very kinetic and whimsical. It was a fun sequence but once again doesn't fit my very clear strict standards of what a Clash of The Titans movie should be or should have.

#2 The locations. Unlike George Lucas, Leterrier's team wasn't allergic to shooting on location. So they went around the world and shot in some beautiful spots and built some massive and very cool looking sets abandoning as much green screen as they could. Their hard work pays off here because you feel like their world exists. A place that you can visit. Medusa's lair and Mount Olympus stand out the most.

#3 The costumes were cool as well. It was evident that every detail was not missed here. Attention was paid to the look and feel of every character. From Perseus simple fisherman rags to Zeus golden armor.

I could go on but I think I have written enough and I'm sure most of you have stopped reading by now so I will take my leave with my final comments.

Clash of The Titans 1981 was a film that in my mind is close to perfect entertainment so as far as I am concerned, ANY attempt to remake it was going to be put under a SEVERE microscope by yours truly. I obviously displayed that in this review. Having said that I have to be fair to this remake. With my undying passion for it's predecessor there really wasn't any way I could be truly objective despite the excitement the trailers and clips created. It's because of this lack of separation between the classic and it's modern counterpart I will bestow 2 scores. A Geek score and my "D" List score.

On the 5 star Geek score. Clash of The Titans gets 1.5 stars. With a "Netflix It" recommendation.
The many deficiencies with the script, complicated plot plus the lighting fast run time really hurt this one.

On the 5 star "D" List score. Clash of The Titans gets 3 stars with a "Go See It" recommendation.

I know a lot of you rely on my reviews to decide if you should venture out to see these movies. With that in mind I hope I didn't create a lot of confusion for you. This one was tough for me being such a fan of the original. If you are having trouble deciding just ask yourself this question. How much of a fan are you of the original. If you are a super geek fan like me then wait for the DVD. If not then go for it. You should be entertained by the action and style.

That's all for today.

Not sure what's up next so stay tuned.

Until Next Episode....."I'll Save You A Seat!"

"D"